ahhhh moving towards AHHH

Ahhhh moving towards Ahhh

So I wouldnot give b umm 50 cents yesterday ,, and some how that is LIFE FUCKING CHANGINNG ? …..HMMMM moving towards that which FEELS GOOD

NO ONE but you realy knows the feeling of AHHH of release , relaxation , relief …. And all the other RE’s I guess maybe like the RE I bring up all the time of recreational sex … I wonder what RE is …

The AHHHH ..feeling the letting go of resisitance ( hey there is that RE again ) that is the gorwning cell by ceel towards that which feels good ,,and true to you ,,NOW the words of a TEACHER are jus that ,,, words of someone else ,,if you gewt stuck there you are living their life not yours …. Again showing how nice humanity is how well trainable we are ….. to listen and follow the directions of the lsave master … but the teacher is teaching you to be FREE so how can he be the slave master …. The teacher is NOT but you ddeep in yo are still the SALVE looking for a master to follow …. Since there is no clear cut PHAROH in your life as if you had choosen to listen to the words of the PRIEST or paster ,, again just teachers but hese ones NEED LEGIONS of followers to make their monthly bills $$$ … ( in the name of god )

Back to AHHHH ….. in mediaition in quiet time ( mediation sound s so fucking formal …. It is just QUIET time time whithout the distraction of all the people in your life who want you ( and you want them TOOO ) but time alone to RE-LAX and in that time it is time to FEEL …… what you feel not the needs of all your loved ones but what do YOU dipshit want …. Even to FEEL the words and re-commendations of the teacher to EVALUaTE them ,,,,, in terms of your FEELINGS of WANTS …….. what makes you feel GOOD … and fun and excited and wanting to get out of bed ,, with PURPOSE ……living the life process not just some fucking DREAM of living .

In the AHHHH’s yu get …. The ideas that give you feelings of AHHHH sure they can be exciting , but do they make you feel AHHHHH also ..like a HEAVY BURDEN was lifted ..yet there can still be aspects that are NEW and fRESH and that can bring up … feelings of unknowing=ness // exctement .( excitement stress) but what is the deeper feeling is it AHHHHHH or is it ….GRRRRRRRRRR ?

The bum who asked for 50 cents ,,, has the world of time ,, time he has money he does not ..so he BEGGS .. and well on average the world gives …ask and it is given ….
( does the waiting on the reciving of META physical magic mumbo jumbo make you feel AHHHHH ? or hidden stress of doubt ? )

so …. I have been asking in my meditation for clearity of my day to day ..wants ,,, I have not been feeling PASSION ….. and fun in the PROCESS ..the day to day walk ,,, ohh sure I got a great life .. hard to believe anyone could have anything better but the possibility of the TAO is for even expaninding and that means evenr EXPANDING joy , or AHHHHHH also …. The sale the offer my home http://www.clarkhodges.net/Jensen_Beach/Florida/Homes/St_Lucie_County/Agent/Listing_1704043.html is most likey not going to go thru ….. this waiting game is not giving me the feeling of AHHHHH ….. it does not satify that CREATIVE side of me …. Just waiting it is NOT FUN nor does it feel ike moving towards bliss ……and if I am DAY TO DAY not living a life of moving towards what I FEEL IS BLISS or my AHHHHH’s then
WHOSE LIFE am I living ? ( did you get that ? in that is a wonderful question if you will take the SECOND to let in SINK into your won life of FEELING your won PROCESS of living )

Now a good idea today will be still a good idea of living TOMORROW ,, in fact REAL passions KEEP WELLING ….back to the surface of your mind without the NEED .. ( remember want everything NEED nothing enjoy now ) without the NEED or worry tha the good idea will be forgotten . true PASSION does not have to be forcerd it is …that INSTINCT the nature …of you ( not me not the recomeneations of anyone else ..the guidance or PRODING of others to do something ) but the inner you following htat which feels AHHHH to you

The passionate dream keeps coming back over and over …. And the LIVING PROCESS of that tdream feels like RELIEF ….. moving towards something that just FEELS GOOD ..? are you living like that ?

Ok ,,,, so a new idea came to me , let me see over this next week or so if … I like it ,, if it keeps comeing to me ,,, if I find myself moving towards this …what is it

Building without selling …. Ohh sure let the house stay on the market but the ACTION of building of working of being HAPPY moving towardsa goal activily … is better to ME … me p[ersonally …than for me to be like the BEGGAR depending on the MAGIC of Meta ..to give me stuff ,,, ( evne thought the sale of my house is not giving ….ohh but do I realy believe that how do I feel my feelings ..not the SHOULDs of great META teachers and their great ideas that on average do not fit everyone , like a glove ,, EXCEPT in the truth of FEELING what feels good to you ?

So if I expand my current business ,,, I know hat willhappen ,,it is like the ROCK of the 1 on 1 relationship certain sublte aspects creep into life and the $$$$ will just disappear inot that business , I like everyone else on average has a level of poeverrty mindset ….. the magic number that we all semm to FALL BACK inot …. An that for most humans is 0 …… on this page I recommend that you use the tool of EE us saving bods to hide $$$ away form yourself …. http://www.instinctualism.org/bdsm_training.html the link is on the page .

I have time …..$$$$ I donot …… my orginal area of the world I had been shooping back 3 years ago is still of interst to me ,,( a good idea will still be a good idea even later ) the idea of keeping the INVESTMENTS of IRD. Is well still good investing and wealth building … it is just aht we are finnaly back inot a reality market where investmenst will grow like in older days slowly until the next cycle of insanity .

Could I niclel and ime a compound ..out of the time and energy I already have alvalible without ..disturbing the COMFY LIFE I LIVE ? and well yesterday in a FLASH of INSPIRTATION I can thank the UNNUSSAL activity of meeting abumm at this area and the EVEN stranger thisn of me saying NO and not GIVING ( did you know the in most Aborignal languages of the americsa the word BRAVE and Generous are synoniums ? the Indian warrior was ,, brave enough to give it all way … to go out inot the woods for a year alone ,,, and in so me tirbes to take the riens of leadership of that tribe meant he again had to give up all his worldy MATERIAL possessions first ..be BRAVE ! or genernous trusitn the toa the flow of the earth spsirt FORE GIVING )

Can I take 1 hour of my day …. To build another busisness ,? And separate that cash flow out ….. hey yestday while …. Web surfing I looked back into tha area I was fisrt shopping and found 5 creas in the 1 hour commutes to 2 towns I wanted first with access to gulf coast water of 1 hour or so …. For like 189 . a month . hmmmm ,interesting …. Could I build the compound and keep the wter front …papradis I love so much also ?

If the AHHHHH I feel now is a good AHHH the idea is real it will still be real a WEEK form ….. the hour day … well would be this hour of writing ….. is the readership EGO I get from here still givng me THE AHHHHHS ? or has it served it purose have I expaned my own ,, concept of what is acceptable by society …. Instincutalism as one more free choice … not what you think or those of my family ..but TO THINE OWNSELF BE TRUE and it shall follow like Day form night you can be flase to no other man ……. My own AHHHHH’s ( out of pocket ,,, hmmmmmm interesting very interesting )